Aaaaaaaaaand .... WE'RE BACK!

Well, it's only been 3 years, not that bad right? .... ;)
How to sum up that much time in so little time? Good question. I don't know. Let's begin by saying, (since the last post was about this), cancer is still good, and everyone has been in good health!
Here's the last few months in a very small nutshell:
Steve: Rockin the position of Bishop in the ward, went to Girls Camp with the ward (rock on) and took a business trip to Boston recently where Heidi flew up and met him so they could have a little vacation.
Heidi: Being an amazing mom! Recently went to Girls Camp with Emily and then took a trip to Boston with Steve and had a most wonderful time!
Charity: Graduated from high school!! WOOO! She will be doing some summer and fall classes at PVCC while working at Cafe Zupas before leaving on a mission in December! She will be turning in her mission papers July 11. :)
Emily: Currently in California with a couple friends having a blast. She nannies a couple kids once or twice a week. She will be a Senior in the fall!
Zac: Went to scout camp and is currently at EFY having the time of his life!! He will be starting his Sophomore year in the fall
Jeremy: He always rocks at life, so this category is self explanatory. He will start 8th grade in the fall.
Matt: Taking a summer STEM class and enjoying it! He will be starting 6th grade this fall
Sam: Little Sam is growing up so fast! He was baptized last year and will be starting 3rd grade this fall!
[this blog was updated with special help by: Viewers Like You, Thank you. and Charity]

I'm FREEEEEEEE!

After one of the longest weeks ever I am happy to say that I am free!!!  I talked to the nuclear medicine people up at the hospital and they said I have NO more restrictions!!! I can't tell you how happy that makes me.  I have been hugging my kids all morning!!  If only I had some energy to go with the excitement I feel. :)  My poor body has been through the ringer and doesn't want to do a whole lot yet.  We'll stick with bare necessities for now.

I go in for a full body scan on Wednesday, the 22nd to see if the radiation has done it's job.  I'll be glad to have the all clear and be able to start taking thyroid replacement medicine and get to feeling a little more normal.  My stomach is still not happy a lot of the time.  It's kinda been like having morning sickness--not my favorite.  On a happy note, I'm done with taking calcium supplements!! Happy day!  

Yesterday was our Christmas service at church and my kids did a lot on the program.  Charity and Emily spoke on Christmas traditions and the birth of Christ.  Jeremy, Matthew and Sam sang with the primary choir.  Then Charity, Emily and Zac sang with the ward choir and Jeremy played the bells with 2 other boys his age as another musical number.  I was very sad to have to miss it all, but my Dad recorded it for me (audio) so I could listen to it last night.  They were all awesome!!!  I am so happy that all of this yucky stuff has been surrounded by the joy and excitement of Christmas.  And now we have 5 more days till Christmas.  Five blessed days to be together as a family--just enjoying being together, playing and hugging and squeezing!!! (Can you tell I've missed my family?!?)

I want to share some thoughts I shared with a friend the other day about going through all of this--losing my mom this past year and then facing cancer without her by my side:

"While I wouldn't wish the challenge of losing a mother on anyone, there have been great blessings that have come, but mostly I have learned to turn to my Savior because He is the only one that can take that pain and anguish and bring comfort and peace.  I am SO grateful to know of the atonement and to have learned through all of this that there is SO much more to the atonement than just taking our sins away.  He has felt every pain!!! . . even the one that comes from wishing Mom was there to help you pick out the right curtains or wishing she was there to hold your hand when no one else can.  As trivial as it may seem to some, I have learned that my slightest pain can be eased by and through Him.  I don't know how people can go through adversities without that knowledge and blessing in their lives.

I, too, have had those moments where the Lord has used others when I needed to hear or feel that love from my mom.  There have been many times where I have needed a hug or to know that she loves me and someone has reached out with that hug or words of love from her.  Other times it has been bumping into an old friend that I haven't seen in years that offers that connection to her.  I appreciate the thought you shared of feeling those hugs as coming from the Savior and your mom.  Many times I haven't been able to differentiate--which is comforting to me, to know that the same love is shared by both.  It is such a strength to me!  I have definitely felt that strength over the past year and especially through these past few months.  I have felt their presence SO many times, lifting and supporting me.  I feel like I have nothing to complain about (though sometimes I still do) with the great blessings that have come through all of this.  When I look back, all of the bad has been lost amidst the numerous blessings and tender mercies.  His love is just amazing to me!!"

I do feel truly blessed through all of this and greatly appreciate all of the prayers that have been offered in my behalf.  I can feel the power of those prayers lifting me each day and I know I couldn't do it without them.  Thank you for your faith and love!!  I wish you all the merriest of Christmases and pray you will be able to feel the love of our Savior who came as a small babe to such a humble place so many years ago!

A light

I think I can see a light at the end of the tunnel. . . .after 3 days of headache and nausea I'm ready for a change. (I only threw up once-the first day, but the Dr's feel that my body had enough time to absorb enough radiation to do the trick) I haven't been able to eat and drink like I'm supposed to (lots of fluids to help flush out the excess radiation) and I was a little dehydrated. So, yesterday I took some anti-nausea meds which have helped a LOT. The only drawback is that it knocks me out. But, it seems to be doing the trick and I've been able to get some more fluids in me. My face/neck are a bit puffy this morning. The extra sleep has been good except that I've been having really bizarre, crazy dreams or nightmares. No fun. The kids have been really good about staying away and being good for Steve. I think Steve will be the most grateful when all of this is over. He's been working from home this week, trying to shuffle kids, deal with all the stresses of work, and take care of me. Poor guy is worn out!

A HUGE thank you to everyone who has helped us out with food and rides and kids. It has been such a relief to not have to worry about that on top of everything else. What would we do without friends and family? You guys are awesome!!! Thank you!

PS Steve just came in to tell me that we have a broken main pipe in the front yard. When it rains, it pours. . . One more thing to fix. Anyone know a good plumber?


PPS Thanks to Kathie for fixing up my blog to match the season! You did awesome!!

TGIF

After some drama with the lab I got my results back Thursday morning and we are set for radiation on Monday. The Dr's wanted my results to be above 50 and they are 109. So, I'm glad that we can move forward and get it over with. Each day I feel a little more run down, especially by the end of the day. (I'm glad there is an end in sight.) The Dr's changed my isolation period from 3 days to 8 days so I'll have lots of time to myself next week. I'm a little anxious about how I will feel and also about being away from everything for that long. Anyone that knows me well, knows I don't like being away from the chaos for too long. I love being around others, especially my family. I will miss their hugs and snuggles.

I'm trying to finish up Christmas preparations since the kids will be out of school by the time I'm out of isolation. We'll see how long this body of mine will hold up. I started with a little cold/flu bug yesterday as well, so I'm being forced to rest a little more. Oh well, what gets done will get done.

Thank you again for all the love and prayers and offers to help. I feel so very blessed to have such support for me and my family.

Thanksgiving and more

We had a wonderful Thanksgiving this year. All of my family except for one sister were able to come. There were about 54 of us for Thanksgiving dinner. I absolutely LOVE spending time with my family!!!

 (I stole these from my sis-in-law.  Silly me forgot a camera)


One of the highlights was running a 5k that morning. I started running a few months ago and was talking to my sis in law and we thought it would be a lot of fun to all run a 5k together while we were all here. I was very disappointed to find out that surgery/cancer was going to interfere. Well, another of the Lord's tender mercies came. He knew how much it meant to me to be able to run and gave me the strength to do it. I know it may seem silly to some, but I really wanted to be able to do this. I asked my Dr. and he said I could run 2 weeks after surgery. The 5k was 2 weeks and 1 day after, so I ran. It wasn't my best time, but I did it. Thanks to my family for supporting me and running with me!

Paul,Chris, Scott, Mike Jeff
Me, Amy, Dan, Kent, Amy, Brad
Emma

Another highlight of the weekend was the chance Steve had to go with his brothers on an adventurous motorcycle ride. They have been planning this for months and months. After my diagnosis, Steve told his brothers that he wasn't going. I was finally able to convince him the week before that I would be ok and that I wanted him to go. The ride was an off-road race from LA to Barstow to Vegas, a 2 day ride. It was very cold and very tough (lots of sand) but I think they're all glad they went. Right, boys?
Kenny, Wayne, Steven, Owen
at the finish line in Vegas

A quick update on treatment- I am slowly feeling more of the effects of having no thyroid. It's not great, but not too terrible either. One of the biggest things is being cold. I have a very hard time staying warm, especially in the mornings. The only thing that I have found that works is taking a really hot shower and it takes a good 20-30 minutes before I get warm. So, today while I was at the store I bought an electric blanket. It is my new best friend. I love it! :) I'm slowly learning how to deal with these little annoyances.

My calcium levels are still low and so I continue to take ginormous amounts of calcium every day. I'll be SO glad when I'm done with that. My incision looks great and my neck is feeling good. There is still a little residual pain every once in a while and a little pain in my right ear from nerve damage, but I feel very blessed to be doing as well as I am. My energy is dropping every day so I'm hoping that means my TSH levels are dropping as well. I'm still doing well managing everything, I just get tired easily and have to stop and rest which is another little annoyance. :) I will go in next week for more blood work to check my levels again. If they are low enough we are planning on doing radiation on the 13th--two weeks from today. Keep your fingers crossed.

I think that's it for tonight. I am truly blessed to have such amazing support from all of my family and friends. I appreciate so very much the prayers offered in my behalf. I can feel the power and strength from those prayers and know I would not be as well off as I am if it weren't for a loving Father in Heaven who is watching over me and my family and answering those prayers. Thank you!

Fantastic Friday

Today was a great day. I almost feel normal again--aside from tiring easily. Every morning I wake up feeling better than the day before. It is great to have energy and be able to move. :) I even got to drive today--ok it was only 2 miles, but hey, ya gotta start somewhere. My range of motion in my neck is almost normal again and I am virtually pain free. Life is good!!!
Steve took me to get blood work done on his lunch hour today and we had to wait for over an hour--not the best way to spend an hour together but hey, we were together. He also took me to dinner and a movie last night. It was SO good to get out! Looking forward to the next week of "normal" before my levels start to drop and I lose energy again.

Public Service Announcement

. . .We interrupt your regularly (or not so regular) scheduled blogging to bring you an annoying update. This blog has been temporarily taken over by cancer. The big ugly monster has taken over again so we will use this blog to give updates, so that my wimpy voice doesn't have to repeat and people don't have to wonder what's going on. Steve has hooked me up with a sweet little laptop so I can keep in touch with the outside world while I'm laid up. (Thanks, Love). So, I figured I can take a few minutes every once in a while and post on here to help people stay in the loop and understand what's going on.

. . .Back to the beginning. I went in for a physical a couple months ago and mentioned I had been having some minor issues with a lump in my throat. The Dr. suggested an ultrasound and blood work to check my thyroid. Blood work came back great, but the ultrasound showed a nodule on the right side. They reassured me it was nothing but said that it needed to be biopsied just to be sure. Well, the biopsy showed that it is Papillary thyroid cancer. After some more tests and a second opinion we had surgery last Wednesday the 10th. They removed my entire thyroid and all the lymph nodes on the right side. I went in this morning to have the stitches removed and the Dr. told me that the cancer had spread to one of the lymph nodes--not a big deal, but not great. Everything should get wiped clean when they do radiation in a few weeks.

Surgery was not too bad--I think the anticipation was the worst part. Pain medicine is great! Every day I feel a little stronger and a little less pain so that is good. The Dr. said that by next wednesday I should be back at 80% as far as how I feel so that will make for a good Thanksgiving. After that I will start to feel the effects of hypothyroidism. Since I have no thyroid I will have no thyroid hormone and will continue to become more hypothyroid. As soon as my levels reach a certain low then they will do the radioactive iodine treatment and I will have to be isolated for 3 days. I will then have a nuclear scan to make sure everything is in order and doing it's job and then they can start me on thyroid replacement medicines and can start a slow climb out the pit.

So, to all of you who thought you'd missed your chance to help out this week--never fear, there is more to come. The Dr. told me the day after surgery that the way I felt now was nothing compared to how rotten I'll feel when I'm hypothyroid. So, I guess I just need to keep my chin up and trust in Higher Hands to help me through. Speaking of hands, I am SO very grateful to all of you who have offered words of encouragement, support and love. To all of you who have come and visited, taken my kids to and from and brought in meals. We have had the yummiest food ever this week!! I couldn't do this without all of you! And a huge thank you also to my sisters who are amazing and are always there for me! And to Steve and my kids who have totally stepped up and have taken over "mommy jobs" for me and have waited on me and snuggled with me and given me never-ending encouragement ('Mom-you turned your head! Good Job!')
I love you all!

5 days post-op, before stitches taken out
(I had an allergic reaction to the antibiotic ointment they put on so there is a little rash that makes it look worse than it really is.)

Family Pictures

After way too long we finally had family pictures taken. A good friend did an absolutely amazing job. Thanks again, Jamie!!! Here are a few favorites until I upload some more.

Happy Birthday to Mom!

To celebrate Mom's birthday, all of us girls went to lunch (a birthday tradition) at Macaroni Grill--mmmm. . .good food and great company--what more could you ask for?!?!

Tonight we all met at the cemetery for cupcakes and wrote notes to Mom/Gma which we attached to white balloons. After we sang Happy Birthday we let the balloons go and watched as they went up to Heaven. It was a great night.
Happy Birthday, Mom!

Writing birthday notes to Grandma


Emily addressed hers to Ruth Bowler --Heaven
from Emily Wilson - Earth. :)

Almost ready

Charity

Ready to sing!
Everyone was trying to make their balloon the highest so that theirs would get to Mom/Gma first. Uncle Clay cheated and tied his to Aunt Karen's so his was the highest--it's so high it wasn't even in the picture.

Yummy cupcakes

Charity & Emily

Uncle Clay and Aunt Karen stuffing their faces!

A little more. . .

Mother's Day 2010

First a bit about Mother's day. The two weeks leading up to Mother's day were very emotional and difficult. I was very worried about how I would make it through this day of Mothers. I've really been missing her. All in all, it was a good day--there were a few tough times, some very sweet moments, lots of love from my kids and Steve and it ended on a good note. My heart is full of love and gratitude for the many women in my life who have helped and continue to help me along my way--sisters (that includes in-laws), aunts, dear friends and the many women who play the part of 'mom' to me. I had a surprise visit from a dear friend, Annie(my 'second' Mom), who came to sit through church with me. Knowing it would be hard for me, she made the drive all the way out here and sacrificed time away from her own family to be there for me. It was such a sweet gift to me and something that was SO appreciated. I can't put into words what it meant to have her there.

Steve got me a glider bench for the back patio and the boys helped put it together.


This past week I have felt a new-found strength and courage to move forward with a smile on my face. Not sure how long it will last, but I am happy for the change. I have felt the faith and strength that Mom had throughout her life, but especially over the last year. I have enjoyed reading her journals and blog posts and am reminded of the unwavering faith she had in our Father and His plan for her and for us as a family here on earth. She is such an amazing example to me and I will forever be grateful for the things she taught me, especially the things of the gospel and the way that she helped me learn for myself. I am who I am because of the Mother that she was.

OCTOBER 2009

This is one of the last pictures I had taken with my Mom. This was the Saturday before she passed. Those days are something very precious and sweet to me. Something I hope to never forget. There was a sweet, sweet Spirit that attended that home as we were gathered there as family around our Mother. There was such an outpouring of the Spirit and love for one another--even amidst the sadness of losing Mom for a time--it was something I have never experienced before. It was truly Heavenly. There were angels there attending us and watching over us and I know that they continue to do so. I have felt their strength and love and guidance, including that of my own angel Mother.

FUNERAL-October 8th, 2009

Grandsons: Chris, Brad, Dan, Derrek, Alec, Calvin, Spencer and Zac as Pall Bearers

I am so grateful to know that we can be a forever family!

David, Jeff, Mike, Scott, Kent, John
Wendy, Kathie, Jennie, Me

LUNCHEON

I am forever grateful for such a wonderful family, not just immediate, but also extended, in-laws, and outlaws. One of the up sides to something like this is getting to see family and friends you don't get to see very often. I was so happy to see aunts, uncles, grandparents, and dear friends who traveled near and far to come and pay their respects and show their love.

Thank you to everyone who helped us through this week: providing food, love, time, help and support. We couldn't have made it without you!

Chicks! October 28th

Yes, we have chickens. One more thing to add to our ever-growing list of pets. Steve stopped by the feed store on a saturday afternoon and came home with these adorable little fuzzballs. They stayed in a box in the garage for the first 6-7 weeks and then Steve built a coop for them. (pictures to come)

They are very tame and love to be held. Their names are Fred, Ted, and Henry.
Good names for hens, don't ya think?

They've grown so much already!

Boys!

Sam is still a mischievous little boy that keeps us on our toes. On this day he took a zip-tie thing that is used to launch a toy and zip-tied it around his wrist. He came to me in tears afraid of getting in trouble, but in pain because it was squeezing. Poor kid. Dr. Dad was there for a quick fix and mom had to snap a picture so we can remember some of the silly things this kid does.

This is one of the better things that happens when you leave kids unsupervised.
It could have been markers, right?
They were SO proud of themselves!

My brother, Scott, came for a short visit the end of September to see Mom. Sam absolutely adores him and was beyond happy when he woke up and found Scott sleeping on our couch!
He couldn't have asked for a better surprise.

Sam's Birthday-September 8th

Sam turns 5!!!

I can't believe my baby is 5 already. Time is flying by so quickly. I wish that I could freeze time. Sam is such a sweetheart and brings a lot of joy into our home. He has a great sense of humor and loves to quote movies. Being the youngest and only one home during the day he has become a treasured sidekick. I love taking him shopping, or going to visit Grandma, or just snuggle on the couch. He is a ray of sunshine in my life!

The kids thought is was especially funny that the frosting balloons on the cake came off with the candles.

Yippee for playdoh!!

A bug vacuum and terrarium. Just what every little boy needs!

Swords from his cousins!

Waiting to sing "Happy Birthday"

We were lucky to have so many of our family here to celebrate. Mike and his family were in town visiting, plus we had most of the 'local' families there. We appreciate everyone coming to make Sam's day a fun one!

A New Year

I have put off blogging for too long. There have been many, many things to blog about but the task just seems to be too much for me, physically and emotionally. I've been reading my Mom's journals and have felt the need to be recording our happenings so that my kids will have something to look back on and remember the fun times we've had (and the not so fun, too). These past 4 months have been quite a roller coaster. It's hard to believe that it's been 4 months already. We've had lots of emotions and adjusting to not having Grandma around-- mixed with all the fun of the holidays and being with family! I have loved being with my family--they are such a strength to me.

So here is the beginning of trying to recapture the past 5 months.

Camping -Labor Day

We went camping over labor day weekend with Wayne's family just south of Flagstaff. It was beautiful--one of our favorite spots and we brought the motorcycles this time!! Wahoo!
Jeremy, Josh, Leah, Sam, Matthew

Playing chess is a must when we go camping.
I think there was always someone playing.

Steve was teasing the girls because it was Sunday and we were getting a new YW president in our ward. Since we were out in the woods our dear friend, Carlee, was texting us the play by play to find out who it was going to be. We were so excited to find out that Sis. Butler is the new YW President!!!!

Zac on the 80.
I don't think the bikes ever stopped running. They were going non-stop.

Steve and Wayne playing guitar.
It was so fun to sing songs around the campfire with the guitars.

Another highlight was riding on Wayne's quads.

How many kids can you fit on one quad?

Zac showing off his battle wounds a few days later. He crashed on the motorcycle (slid in some gravel) and got some serious road rash. I didn't want him to feel bad so I crashed, too. Silly kids! I went over the handlebars when I hit some rocks on our last run down the mountain. I broke a couple ribs and sprained my knee along with lots of pulled muscles and bruises and cuts. It's no fun getting older. We don't bounce back as well as the younger ones. :)
All in all, it was an amazing weekend! Thanks Wayne and Becky!

Good Memories

MONDAY, September 28th

My kids were out of school on Monday so we decided to take Mom to the zoo. Kathie and Jack came with us. The weather had cooled off a bit and so we took advantage of it. It did get pretty warm by the time we left. The kids each took turns pushing Grandma in her wheelchair and trying to wheel around her oxygen tank with it. They played in the water for a bit and 'splashed' grandma to keep her cool, too. It was a great day.

TUESDAY, September 29th

Tuesday, Mom spent the day with Jennie, Lynda, and Kathie. Jennie collected porcelain dolls for many years and decided that it was time to sell some, so they spent the day taking them out of storage, cleaning them and taking pictures of them--and eating--what is a get-together without food?

WEDNESDAY, September 30th--Mom's birthday!!

John (& little Brookie), Rachel and I took Mom to breakfast at IHOP. Then Rachel and I took Mom for pedicures. It was one of the few things Mom did for herself and she had been wanting one for a long time. Now, she'll have beautiful toes forever. :)

When mom was first diagnosed someone got her a musical card and Sam fell in love. Then we gave her another one. Every time we went to Grandma's house Sam would go over to her basket and find those musical cards and carry them around while we were there. Then one day, a few months ago while at the store Sam found one that sang "You are my Sunshine" and we had to get it for her. He would take that one out and sing it to Grandma. So, what else would Sam want than to give her another musical card for her birthday?!? He was SO excited to give it to her.

Emily and Grandma share a great love for Disneyland and Mickey. Emily came up with the idea to make her a Mickey cake for her birthday. Isn't it cute?!?

Happy Birthday, Mom! We love you!

I feel so blessed to have had this day to share with you.